Demi Lovato comes out as non-binary, identifies as they/them
Photo credit: Demi Lovato/Twitter
Demi Lovato recently started a podcast that’s all about deep-diving into thought-provoking topics. On the first episode of 4D with Demi Lovato, the singer announced some amazing news with the Lovatics.
Lovato confided, “I wanna take this moment to share something very personal with you. Over the past year and a half, I have been doing some healing and self-reflective work. And through this work, I’ve had the revelation that I identify as non-binary. With that said, I will be officially changing my pronouns to they/them. I feel that this best represents the fluidity I feel in my gender expression. [This form of expression] allows me to feel most authentic and true to the person that I know I am and still am discovering.”
Photo credit: Demi Lovato/YouTube
For those who are unfamiliar with the term, non-binary refers to individuals who experience their lives outside of the idea of a man or a woman.
The singer continued, “I’m excited to share with you what this means to me and what it may look like for other people. I wanna make it clear that I’m still learning and coming into myself. And I don’t claim to be an expert or a spokesperson.”
Photo credit: Demi Lovato/YouTube
To further discuss the enby identity, the singer invited author, performer, and non-binary community advocate, Alok Vaid-Menon for a chat.
Lovato gushed about their guest and said, “It was the first time in so long that I heard someone else [Vaid-Menon] speak my truth and then realize, ‘Oh, that’s my truth, too!’”
Demi Lovato shared how listening to Alok Vaid-Menon helped them discover their true identity.
(Trigger warning for mentions of drug abuse.)
Photo credit: Demi Lovato/YouTube
During the podcast, Lovato recounted the time when they overdosed and how the singer realized that they were trying to suppress their true identity.
They shared, “I was suppressing who I really am in order to please stylists or team members, this or that, or even fans that wanted me to be the sexy feminine popstar in the leotard and look a certain way. I thought that was what I was supposed to be and now I just realize that it’s so much more important to live your truth than to ever suppress yourself because that’s the type of stuff that happens when you do.”
Vaid-Menon had a similar enby experience and shared, “My entire life growing up in Texas, I was dissociated. I was living someone else’s idea of who I should be. I was so afraid of my own voice. I didn’t allow any video or audio recording. There were so few photos of me growing up because I just wasn’t comfortable with the boxes that people were putting me in.”
Photo credit: Demi Lovato/YouTube
Vaid-Menon continued, “I had so much shame and that’s the story for both of us [Demi and I]. That when you have that kind of shame and repression, it can almost kill you.”
Perhaps the most groundbreaking revelation from the podcast is when they defined shame as “joy interrupted.”
Both Lovato and Vaid-Menon felt caged into definitions that people would impose on them. There was so much energy wasted in presenting what was acceptable to others. Both felt relieved when they detached themselves from societal gender roles.
Lovato exclaimed, “I’m still a successful boss bitch or boss person!”
In the same episode, the enbies joked about the gendered terms with Demi Lovato wondering if they should be called a cowboy, cowgirl, or cow human.
Alok Vaid-Menon ressaured Lovato and the audience, “You get to choose what terms to use for yourself. Doesn’t matter! All that energy and time belongs to you. Authenticity is worth it.”
To further delve into the specific experiences of the non-binary identity, watch the full interview below.
But as Lovato pointed out to viewers and listeners, “Everyone’s healing looks different, this is just what mine looks like for me.”
What should Demi Lovato work on next? How do you live your own truth? Do you have a better understanding of the enbies now?